So looks like I will be going to NJ after all, even though it's not to be with Nav.When we broke up my life went to shit and with the grief over my grandmother and the pain of losing him too I got a little crazy. I couldn't sleep so I was taking Ambien, and drinking quite a lot and just couldn't deal with school, he did this to me 3 weeks before my finals knowing how it would affect me he wasn't kidding when he told my brother he needed to be selfish, that was beyond selfish. So yeah I quit school which brought the wrath of my father down upon me, I don't blame him I just blew $30k and for what, over a guy who really didn't give a rats ass about me. So Pops said he wouldn't pay for me to retake the semester, that was his first reaction, but I knew my dad and his obsession with education. So as punishment, he was going to make me miss next semester and start over in the fall, which means losing an entire year and graduating in 2013 instead of 2012. Little did he know I had already transferred to Rutgers and have my loan in place, a loan I have no idea how I am going to pay back, I got it with Navi's encouragement because he said he'd help me pay for it :( now there's no Navi, no support and I am fucked with a student loan I can't pay back. But anyway, if I go to Rutgers for the semester, I am hoping this will encourage my father to let me finish over the summer or I might even take a summer semester at Rutgers myself and that way I can graduate in August instead of having to wait until 2013. It sucks and it will mean I would have to take out another loan over the one I already can't pay off but hey at least I'll be done with school and can look forward to looking for work and branching out on my own and trying to make up some of the loan money I will owe!
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